Losing It

Yesterday I lost it.

The baby was crying in my ear for 2 hours straight - poor thing had a fever and wanted to nurse. My 2 and 4 year olds were in the bath and my 6 year old was having a tantrum. And I lost it. Without going into detail, I acted like a child myself and behaved in a way that I'd never recommend or consider "good parenting".

So today, in efforts to move on, I called my friend for some support.

She gave me what I needed. She advised me to be more empathetic to my 6 year old's tantrums, to give myself more slack, and to recognize my triggers.

And she made me laugh. She said "Listen, nobody wants to lose it. No sane person says to himself 'Hey, I'm going to lose it now, I think that's an effective way to overcome my obstacles'." And yet, in the moment, we ARE insane - we actually think that losing-it will get our needs met! Is that crazy or what?

Most important, she reminded me that in a busy household, everybody loses-it sometimes. We all have our moments. And she went so far as to say that it would be a disservice to our kids if they never saw us make our shameful human errors. They need to know that's normal and learn to forgive and move past. It's an incredibly important skill and will help in their emotional development.

SO - let's take a moment to appreciate our friends. And another moment to give our kids an extra hug and forgive them and ourselves for behaving like 2 year olds (unless, of course, your kid really IS 2 years old, in which case just celebrate that you've both made it this far!)