The Selfish-Brat Mom

Generally I think we Moms can do a better job of supporting each other.

But there are some Moms who are beyond my comprehension: those Selfish-Brat Moms who think the world revolves around them (and maybe their kids).

I encountered such a mom this week while teaching with Tuney Tots. She was so incredibly self-centered, she spat curses at the librarian who was politely asking her to follow the library rules (no lollipops during class, for example). It started me thinking - maybe we can learn from such moms - learn how NOT to behave, in public or in private. Here are some tips:

Rules of the Selfish-Brat Mom: a brief introduction:

1. Remember that the world revolves around you. If you want something, that's the most important thing right now, immediately. This holds true also of your kids: if you need them to do something, you will coerce, manipulate, threaten, or punish in order to get your way - even if it's something ridiculous to expect (like your 2 year old putting himself to bed each night).

2. Assume your kids have done no wrong. Ever. If accused that your child hit another child, shrug it off and ask "can you prove it?"

3. Rules are made to be bent. School policies aren't so important, or carpool lanes. Modes of conduct will follow whatever you think *should* be, rather than what other parents have agreed are best for the community. For example: at the local synagogue or church, your child may eat whatever he wants, wander off wherever he wants, talk loudly during the services, etc.

4. Take breaks as often as possible. Hire nannies, send off to daycare, and coerce family into taking care of your kids as much as possible - weekdays, weekends, holidays, or whenEVER. You shouldn't have to work - you did enough just carrying the fetus for 9+ months, right?

5. Scheduling works around your needs, not your kids. This is true of any therapy services, school programs, nap times, etc. For example, if your child needs speech therapy, make sure it doesn't conflict with your weekly manicure, massage, and lunch out with the girls! (The therapist will have to work around all those things, after all). Your child will learn to sleep when its convenient for you, or just crash from exhaustion after being schlepped around. That's ok - quality sleep for kids is overrated.

6. Love can be bought. If your kid is acting needy, clingy, or whiney, buy her a new toy and tell her to go play, since her behavior is downright annoying. If you can't get to a toy quickly, a candy or ice cream should do the trick. Then, you can get back to your texting.

7. When in doubt, blame someone else. You can't possibly be at fault.

Sound familiar? Sadly, many moms fit the bill. Some moms allow their kids to terrorize others and don't care (it's *just too hard to discipline them or teach them appropriate behavior*). Some moms are checked-out on their phones and tablets all-the-time, leaving their kids to fend for themselves at much too-young an age. It's a sad state of affairs, my friends. Sad sad.

***Please share your anecdotes of interactions with Selfish-Brat Moms in my "Comments" section!***