Doulas

Birthing a baby and recuperating afterwards is serious business. It requires a great deal of energy and endurance. Even with modern medicines to ease the process, the mother is often exhausted and overwhelmed both physically and emotionally.

I do my best not to go it alone. For me, support is the key to getting through the hours (in my case MANY hours) of labor, delivery, and beyond. A wonderful way of making sure you have the right support is by hiring a doula. Most can be found by inquiring through DONA - the Doula Organization of North America, and on their website they have an explanation of services: http://www.dona.org/mothers/index.php

I have been blessed in the past with 3 fantastic doulas who helped me in different ways with each of my 3 birthings. The first was mainly an advocate - the doctor on-call was terrible and needed TLC himself. My husband was busy with his own emotions, this being his first baby too, so it was up to the doula to be my spokesperson and make sure the doctor knew my wishes. She was the mediator, the middle-man, and was calm and collected when my husband and I needed that most. The second doula was physically hands-on, as I had my most natural birthing with my #2 and needed a great deal of physical support (for HOURS on-end). The third doula is a massage therapist and yoga instructor (website: www.kashmirhands.com), and she helped me physically and emotionally through a complicated birthing when I wanted to avoid a C-section.

Doulas can be terrific help during and after all kinds of birthing. Even if you know you'll be having a lot of medical intervention (induction, epidural, C-section, etc.) you may need an advocate for the "little things". For example, a friend who had a C-section found herself alone after the surgery, with nobody to help her go to the bathroom! If the father is going to be with the baby in the nursery, someone needs to take care of YOU after the birth - making sure you have something to eat or drink, that you can sit or lay down comfortably, etc. Doulas can and should remain with you for a bit after the birth, to make sure you and your baby are in good care when she leaves.

I haven't yet employed a postpartum doula, but now that I'm pregnant with #4, my next doula has told me she is willing and interested in helping me with postpartum services. I guess I'll blog about it afterwards.

In my opinion, there is no really perfect way of choosing a doula - it's nearly impossible to know what you will want and need when birthing, and even the most prepared parents may be surprised with the end-result. The key is to just find someone you feel comfortable with, someone who is easy to communicate with and seems to understand you. The woman should be a good listener and not have  her own agenda (some "prefer" natural labors and may pressure you to do things you are not comfortable doing). She will need to be a source of comfort in many ways, so you need someone who can instinctively "get" what you are trying to say.

Doulas can be key to making sure you have a very Happy BirthDay!!!